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The best lesson from my music classes wasn’t music—it was life-changing.

How did music help me become a better and a well rounded man? Other than the joy music itself and the cognitive boost that it provides, its biggest benefit has been elsewhere. This benefit can be reaped in many places outside music. I am talking about learning how to learn. It is also called as deliberate practice. A bit of background on my music learning journey. I have been captivated by instrumental music. It can relax me and hold me in a spell. So I was naturally inclined to learn. I enrolled myself into violin classes about 10 years ago. I have enjoyed the learning all these days. But I was not aware of an aspect of music learning, that was a revelation. During the first few classes, I realized that it needs immense amount of practice. Elite musicians practice 10-14 hours a day. They practice a composition hundreds or thousands of times. With my day job, I could not afford to spend so much time on practice. But it did not discourage me. Importance of deliberate practic...
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I'm stuck in a self-improvement loop and can't just enjoy life

How did I fall into this trap? Should I give up on my self improvement habits?   From my childhood, I have been ingrained a mindset of competitiveness. I was focused on my academics. I would try to get into the best universities. I wanted to get the best appraisals at work. I have achieved most of these. Aphorisms such as 'If you are not growing then you are not living', etc. Then I read the book on 'Growth Mindset' which resonated with my spirit of competitiveness. There is an overload of influencers on social media preaching the ultra perfect lifestyle. All these underscore my life's purpose to get better every minute. I have a packed weekend routine. I learn music. I practice two foreign languages. I brush up my technical knowledge. I have self improvement, career related and personal finance books which I am constantly racing to finish. I am fanatical about the cleanliness of my room. I workout till I am sore. I have a to-do list which seems to be ever gro...

Conquering My Ultimate Productivity Killer: A Journey from Shame to Action

I spend the peak productive morning time going through frivolous short videos on YouTube and worthless Reddit discussions. This habit has singularly created a significant downgrade in my professional and personal life so far. This article will outline how I fell into this vicious trap and what I am going to do. It will partly be an accountability article to improve my own life.  Doom scrolling on my phone has insidiously destroyed my life. It started with the apparently useful and self help videos during the Covid lockdown. Now I am hooked to it. Now I watch the cat videos and the adorable Golden Retriever videos more than anything else. Did you read about the dog influencer becoming a millionaire? I was one of the contributors to his wealth.  These worthless videos give me a dopamine rush. It makes me feel good at the moment like an orgasm. But it sucks me into a whirlpool of such videos. The algorithms make sure that it churns up an infinite number of such content to hold my...

Is Waking Up Early Really Required To Be Successful?

 The debate over whether waking up early is essential for achieving success has garnered significant attention. Advocates of early rising often cite the habits of successful individuals and various studies suggesting a correlation between early mornings and productivity. However, the question remains: is waking up early truly necessary for success, or can night owls thrive just as well? This article explores the scientific evidence, the pros and cons of waking up early, potential middle grounds, and strategies for night owls to maximize their productivity.   The Science Behind Early Rising   Research indicates that early risers may have certain advantages over night owls. A study by Harvard biologist Christoph Randler found that morning people tend to be more proactive, which correlates with higher levels of productivity and success in professional settings. Similarly, a large-scale study published in 'Nature Communications' identified genetic factors influencing whet...

Classy Flirting Guide for Men

Flirting is an art that combines charm, confidence, and subtlety. For men looking to engage in classy flirting without coming off as creepy, it’s essential to understand the nuances of attraction and communication. This guide provides practical tips and techniques to help you navigate the world of flirting with grace and respect. Understanding Flirting Flirting is a playful interaction that signals interest without being overtly sexual or aggressive. The goal is to create a connection while maintaining a sense of mystery and intrigue. Here are some foundational principles:   - Confidence is Key: Confidence attracts attention, but it should not be confused with arrogance. Approach flirting with a relaxed demeanor. - Be Subtle: The best flirting often happens in subtle ways. Avoid grand gestures or overly direct approaches that might make the other person uncomfortable. - Read the Room: Pay attention to social cues. If someone seems disinterested or uncomfortable, it’s ...

Building Connections: How Men Can Forge Friendships Beyond the Workplace to Combat Loneliness

 Loneliness is a prevalent issue among men, particularly as they transition from school to work and beyond. Many men find that their social circles shrink after college, often revolving around work-related relationships. This can lead to feelings of isolation, especially when personal connections are limited. Forming friendships outside of work is crucial for emotional well-being, providing support, camaraderie, and a sense of belonging.   Why Men Struggle to Make Friends   Several factors contribute to men's difficulties in making friends outside of work:   - Work-Centric Identity: Many men identify strongly with their professional roles, which can dominate conversations and limit personal interactions. This focus on work can create barriers to forming deeper connections.   - Social Anxiety: Initiating conversations and suggesting plans can be daunting. Some men may feel overwhelmed by the prospect of reaching out to strangers or acquaintances. ...

The Role of Hobbies and Interests in Attracting Women on Dating Apps

Hobbies and interests play a significant role in attracting women on dating apps, influencing perceptions of compatibility, attractiveness, and overall engagement. Research indicates that specific interests can enhance profile visibility and desirability, while the nature and number of hobbies presented can vary in effectiveness between genders.   Attractive Hobbies for Men   For men, certain hobbies are particularly appealing to women. A study by eHarmony identified the following top interests that tend to attract female attention:   1. Travelling 2. Exercise 3. Theatre 4. Dancing 5. Cooking These interests suggest a well-rounded individual who values health, culture, and social experiences. Furthermore, men who list a variety of hobbies (six or more) typically receive more interactions than those with fewer interests. This variety showcases personality depth and an active lifestyle, traits that many women find attractive. Attractive Hobbies for Women ...